Published on August 28th, 2017 | by Sue Waldman0
Keeping Love Alive
People commonly struggle with keeping love alive in their relationships. Regrettably, the energy once invested in the beginning of the relationship diminishes significantly, leaving one or both partners feeling disconnected from one another. Rather than creating joy together, couples are merely co-existing. A relationship needs vision and intention to grow. It is then possible for each partner to shift from a position of self-absorption to empathy, from blame to ownership, and from being a source of pain to creating safety, comfort and acceptance. This process involves exceedingly clear communication. Knowledge, understanding and compassion for the other not only strengthens a couple’s connection, but also opens up new and expansive possibilities that come with world experience.
Most couples who are struggling to stay together think that for things to improve, extraordinary changes, if not a miracle, have to take place. Most of us are conditioned to believe that these changes need to be made by our partner, not ourselves. But we often don’t realize that we have no control over our partner’s behavior.
As a result, we develop a sense of hopelessness and helplessness about the relationship. The breakthrough comes when we realize that by making small changes in ourselves, we can inspire huge, positive changes resulting in feeling more optimistic, hopeful and open to our partners.
Couples can learn to fine-tune and develop skills so they can effectively and lovingly navigate the challenging relational waters. Romance can be renewed and love can be celebrated. Getting there is not always easy. Without a compass or a roadmap, it is difficult for couples to find their way. Professional counseling can help.
Sue Waldman (aka Rose Suzanne), LPC, a licensed Psychotherapist and Intuitive Counselor in private practice for over 23 years.