Month after month, year after year for almost eight years now, I struggle with my publisher’s letter. This month, once again, I find myself in same dilemma—what to write about? At first, I thought about tolerance—good subject matter, great timing, a little reminder on tolerance seems appropriate—but it left me uninspired. Tolerance only felt like one piece to a much larger picture I should be considering. Of course, patience walks hand in hand with tolerance. I think you would agree being in lock down coupled with social separation with a splash of so much uncertainty requires a whole lot of patience and tolerance. Surely, I could tie in the two and find a direction. 

But those subjects got me thinking of how I had to acknowledge understanding. Instantly it comes to mind how hard it is to truly understand. Don’t I need understanding to be patience and tolerant? Understanding, everything, everyone, every situation. How can I understand the plight of others? I can try but I will never fully understand their experience, their pain or suffering. I can only try to understand.  

As an example, no matter what you say, explain, or how you describe it, it is inconceivable that a man can truly understand giving birth. Can I, as a man, understand the feelings, the pain, the process, and the experience of being pregnant or giving birth? I think not! Some things you can tell me about, but I will never totally understand. 

Some things I simply have to trust and accept as they are. But to get to understanding I have to be willing to be patient because your experience is what I must try to understand in order to listen correctly.

To truly understand I need to be able to hear you clearly. With an open mind and with empathy. I think I am finally getting somewhere—tolerance, patience, acceptance, understanding, listening. It’s a great start. Now let me think about that and see you next month when I will continue my next dilemma.

In peace, love and laughter,

Joe Dunne, Publisher